This is Paris: Preseason ’25

Paris is perhaps the most productive city for player development in the world. But could you beat one of the richest, most global clubs in football using only players from the City of Lights? Martin Vert has been set that challenge.

May ’25

2021/22 2022/23 2023/24 2024/25

I wake to silence, in my Saint-Ouen apartment, and look over at the clock. It’s 12:15, and the midday sun shines brightly through the shutters. I’m late! I throw on some clothes and rush downstairs and into the street.

But the streets are eerily silent.

I check my watch. It’s 12:07. Which is unsettling. I walk through the quiet in the direction of the Bauer, but all that’s there is a field. Early morning mist seems to have settled across it, which is strange for the time. I cross the street and move across the field, almost having to move the dense fog out of the way with my own hands.

“Unleash them” hisses a Spanish-sounding voice to my left. I turn, and there is the ghost. He is shrouded in an eerie, glowing fog that obscures his face “Now is the time”.

A twig cracks behind me, and I whirl around. “Trust the system” says the other spirit. It’s moving toward him, but like the first, I can’t see it’s face. “The system is the key…” The bell tower rings for midday.

I stand between them, and look from one to the other.

“Unleash them, unleash them unleash them!”

“The system, the system, the system!”

There is a bright flash of light from the sky. I wake. My sheets are drenched in sweat. My sheets are drenched in – mostly – sweat.

This feels like it needs to be something of a turning point season. For the second time, we are in the Champions League group stages, having finished second to PSG, but this time we had a gap to confirm our runners up status. With the money we’ve brought in, it’s time to start this challenge properly. There are a few players leaving, so we need to replace them, and if we recruit well we’ll have a squad with quality in depth, and be able to have a good go in Europe, and hopefully close the gap on our city rivals.

First through the door is Christ Mukelenge. We have made his loan deal permanent, because he was magnificent all of last season, but €7m feels high, especially to our rivals. I’m not a manager that likes to spend money if I can help it, but it feels necessary to catch PSG. Alongside him is former Southampton man Yan Valery, who joins us from Troyes. He is better than Brandon Soppy, who was never convincing as Alpha Sissoko’s understudy. He’ll go out on loan while Valery settles into the first team.

We also need to improve the coaching side if we are to build properly. A new Assistant Manager is required, so former Liverpool man Ragnar Klavan joins as my number 2. Also into the group come a new Head of Youth Development, Jean-Sebastien Merieux, and Sergiy Rebrov joins as a coach and Gregory Coupet improves our goalkeeping training.

I put in a heavy preseason schedule to test out a new defensive tactic. It’s much like the old one, except, I hope, a lot more violent. We will start against Barcelona before a tour of the USA. The rest are top quality opposition to see how we do.

Daniel Costa is picked up from Paris FC. Our rivals have been having a bit of a tough time of late, and only just avoided relegation from Ligue 2 last season. Costa is a young, but very promising, wing back, so he’ll be sent out on loan for some playing time. Idris El Mizouni will be straight into the first team though, after joining from Ipswich, and Alexis Claude-Maurice becomes our second signing from Troyes. He’ll be Mukelenge’s understudy.

But we’re not done with transfers yet. There are still two centre backs to sign, and the first is Sikou Niakate from Guingamp. He’ll fill in for Diarra when needs be. The second is the loan signing of El Chadaille Bitshiabu from PSG. He is massive – 6’6” – but a little lacking in quality. But if he improves enough we may be able to make his loan permanent like we did with Mukelenge. Also, alongside Camara (also 6’6”) I suspect most forwards will ruin their underwear.

Aside from a crazy game against Napoli, our friendlies were promising with lots of bookings, lots of slowing down of the game. It’s not designed to win games, it’s designed to beat up PSG. The Napoli game, 4-4, simply made no sense, but we’ll treat is as an outlier. We’re on the plane to China next, for the Trophee des Champions.

August ’25

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